Harmonica Sunbeam Blog

A WONDERFUL WEDNESDAY(SORT OF)

WELL IM STILL UP FROM WHEN I DID THE 5AM ENTRY TODAY-- THE HEADACHE AND BLURRY VISION ARE STILL PLAGUING ME INTENSELY --THE DOCTOR ISNT THERE ON WED(GOLF DAY) SO I LEFT A MESSAGE-- BY FRIDAY HE HAS TO COME UP WITH A NEW GAME PLAN AND TAKE ME OFF KALETRA-- THIS IS NOT LIVING!--NO I AM NOT GIVING UP THE FIGHT I JUST NEED TO EXPLORE OTHER OPTIONS THAT WONT GIVE ME SO MUCH DRAMA WITH SIDE EFFECTS--I CANT DEAL WITH THE INSOMNIA OR THE EXTRA TOE THATS GROWING ON MY RIGHT FOOT(JOKE)--ON TO THE GOOD STUFF--A FRIEND/FAN PICKED ME UP TODAY AND TOOK ME TO BJ'S TO GET SOME THINGS--LATER ON IN THE EVENING I WAS ONCE AGAIN WHISKED AWAY TO DINNER AND TOP MODEL AT ANOTHER FRIEND/FAN VILLA--BOTH EXPERIENCES WERE COMPLETELY DIFFERENT AND YET THEY HAD A POWERFUL IMPACT--IT FEELS GOOD TO DEAL W/PEOPLE WHO ACTUALLY DO WHAT THEY SAY-THE SAD PART ABOUT BEING ILL IS THAT SOME PEEPS OFFER TO HELP AND THEN NEVER MATERIALIZE WITH WHATEVER THEY ARE GOING TO DO (HOW SAD AND TRIFLING)-- TODAYS EVENTS GIVES ME FAITH IN REAL PEOPLE WHO LIVE BY THEIR WORD- I WONT FOCUS ON THE FLAKES SINCE THERE HAVE BEEN WAY TOO MANY ANGELS ON MY SIDE DURING THIS WHOLE SITUATION AND THEY OUTWEIGH AND MAKE UP FOR ALL THE FLAKES--TOP MODEL HMMM-- THE SHADE IS REALLY THICK NOW--THE BALD CHICK WAS RELEASED AND MISS GHETTO REALNESS WAS ALSO SCRUTINIZED-WHO WILL WIN FOLKS ? PLEASE COMMENT-I MISSED AMERICAN IDOL SINCE I WATCHED THE DOUBLE SERVICE OF ANTM--FILL ME ON THAT ONE IF U CAN AS WELL--IN CLOSING U MAY GET LIKE 10 MORE ENTRIES TONITE SINCE I WILL BE UP ALL *&((&(&-- NITE (JUST JOKING) I WILL BE UP BUT I PROBABLY WILL BE IN TOO MUCH DISCOMFORT TO WRITE AGAIN -BOTTOM LINE - I WILL SEE U ALL TOMORROW! WISHING U A GOOD NITE AND IF U NEED A WAKEUP CALL ANYTIME BETWEEN 2AM AND 7AM SEND AN EMAIL CUZ I WILL BE PERCHED STARING AT THE CEILING AND COUNTING DONUTS (SHEEP ARE BORING)

Posted by sunbeam at April 26, 2006 10:38 PM

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Stay Strong

Posted by: Stay Strong at April 27, 2006 10:53 AM

While I was going through what you are experiecing now...I have to say that it was
the care and concern of those God sent Angels who helped me to endure it...
Kaletra was NEVER my friend and I took the liquid version of it. One scene from
that episode in my life that still stays FRESH in my meomory is the day I lost
my breath and begged the nurse not to leave me...I woke up on a ventilator and
although I culdn't speak (i could see and hear-people) Tons of em' one even
brought me a harley davis teddy bear (with a leather jacket) exposing sides of me
that I didn't want revealed at that moment....oops I got off track (and yeah it
was a previous HAD)Anyway there was this voice inside of me (NO WHITE LIGHTS) and
it said ever so clearly I WANT TO LIVE-this was the response to the clatter I was
hearing and by the way NOISE wasn't to be tolerated during my initial contact
with the other side...anyway the doctor was telling some lady (my mother) that it
was all up to me-and that having dialysis could kill me or help me...I was able to
to manage thru temporary sign language-give me dialysis! 30 days later after the
weight loss, the bed sores, the being put into a HOME where old people are and the
smell of feces was the norm...plus there were no good looking men and I was in a
wheel chair...those God given Angels didn't miss a beat!!!! That was 3 years ago..
May 19th I'll be getting my Bachelors Degree in Social work...I need to help
somebody and I am sharing this experience with you (for no other reason) than to
share it...I heard a powerful mentor say "I am going to LIVE until I die" and
those words have had the impact through all of the stuff WE are living through
today

Much Love & Respect

Rodney W.

Posted by: Rodney at April 27, 2006 11:37 AM

A WONDERFUL WEDNESDAY(SORT OF)

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